Thursday, July 31, 2008

The Golden Apocalypse

Sorry the post is late. I was without internet since Friday, and it was a miracle I got Monday's post up.

I have the perfect title for any movie/book/game/etc. The Golden Apocalypse could stand alone, or be part of known series. For example:

I am Legend: The Golden Apocalypse
National Treasure: The Golden Apocalypse
War of the Worlds: The Golden Apocalypse
The Legend of Zelda: The Golden Apocalypse
Clifford the Big Red Dog: The Golden Apocalypse
(Using my Pokeversion would be ideal) Pokémon: The Golden Apocalypse
Harry Potter: The Golden Apocalypse
Star Wars: The Golden Apocalypse
The Golden Apocalypse
The Golden Apocalypse 2: The Golden Apocalypse

If you’re struggling to make a movie known please contact me and we can negotiate sale of my intellectual property.

Friday, July 25, 2008

This Ain't Your Kid's Pokemon.

  • Imagine waking up one morning to find a mouse has built a nest in your medicine cabinet. Now imagine waking up to a feral mouse a foot tall shooting off lightning in your room.

  • Imagine walking through a forest when you suddenly feel the ground shudder as the very trees in front of you fall before a ten foot Venusaur. You know running is futile but attempt it anyhow, only running a few feet before a vine as thick as a large sapling wraps around you and bashes you against the ground. You bleed heavily, but remain concious as it brings you to it's mouth and swallows you.

  • Imagine walking through a swamp when the slime suddenly quivers beneath you and begins to rise, surronding you. You struggle helplessly against it, only to find that your limbs are firmly glued to your body. The Muk finishes enveloping you and then lays down to digest.

  • Imagine riding a burning steed alongside a river where eight foot Dratini(s?) jump in the sparkling waters.

To save the franchise it must be a hollywood movie, directed by the best (that means not George Lucas. Have you seen the new movie previews?) made in live-action with a HUGE special effects budget. It needs an original storyline without the old beloved characters. It needs action and danger at levels around pg-13. Most importantly pokemon need to be humongous monsters with little or no thinking ability.

Dredged from the dark depths of my mind.

This is how I see everything. Through The Veil of Evil.
5 minute writing
He sat in his cellar at the typewriter, afraid to stay any longer, but far more afraid of leaving. He had brought this to the world and it was his job to document it for everyone’s sake. A roar shook the foundations of his house and a sulfurous stench escaped beneath the rowan door at the far end of the room. He shuddered. It couldn’t be long now. He typed rapidly, and his fingers caused a constant clicking that became the background to the piercing screeches that echoed about the room. He glanced up and involuntarily flinched as yet another shielding sigil on the door flickered and failed. Merely one remained. One spot of magick against an onrushing wave of Darkness. He gulped, and turned back to his work. As he wrote he murmured prayers to the gods, whom he had blasphemed with his works. He knew it was too late for the world. But perhaps his soul could be redeemed. He lost sight of the keys as the light of the final sigil dimmed and died. The pounding that had echoed for the past seven hours and six minutes had ended. Now darkness streamed through the closed door. Its chill reached him before it had crossed half the room. He was far too terrified to move. He opened his mouth to scream, but the Darkness reached him and began to pour inside. He gagged and choked as it streamed into his lungs and stomach. He tried time and again to scream as it burst through his ears into his skull. He fell to the ground writhing as the evil within him began to absorb all his liquids. It poured out of him and ventured upwards to the rest of the unsuspecting earth. In the cellar a withered husk lay on the ground, its skin stretched tight over its bones, mouth forever opened in a silent scream.