“Your time has come, fiend” rasped Vampiric-Demonic-Scourge-Hunter Jacques Cousteau, leveling his harpoon. The figure in the cloak remained motionless. “Not a word, eh?” Jacques paused to cough. “Then you’ll take those non-words with you to the grave” He released the harpoon, and it flew through the air, pinning the cloak to the wall. The body was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, a voice came from behind Jacques, cold and impolite.
“Hah, you cannot kill me! I am king of the mecha-vampires, lord of the semi-dead, and writer of the informational pamphlet Death, and how it affects you! My power is greater than you could ever imagine!” Jacques turned and saw a withered hand reaching for him. He leapt back, onto the mound of fallen werepenguins. He reached into his parka and withdrew his trusty Pistol. Pistol was a sawed off shotgun with electrum shot that could pierce the hide of even the strongest robo-merfiend. He fired Pistol with reckless abandon, aiming for the figures black, twisted heart. Electrum tore through its chest, but the man merely laughed. Jacques suddenly realized who this was. He wasn’t dueling a common Demon-Giant, nor even a Dragon-Harpy. He was fighting with the Necromaster himself.
Jacques charged his foe, activating the condensed-moonbeam blade on Pistol. He pierced through the left ear of the Necromaster, who began to disintegrate. The man smiled as he dissipated, and whispered softly, “Thank you, my son”
“I am no son of yours!” cried Jacques.
“You are that and more.” The Necromaster pushed aside his hood with the last of his strength. He stood for a second, a mirror image of Jacques, and a wind swept him away. Jacques gazed into his own eyes, as he watched himself fly away on the breeze.
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30 comments:
You're in decline, snap out of it Reogan.
No, no I'm not. This obviously isn't meant to be taken seriously, as is evidenced by the words 'Vampiric-Demonic-Scourge-Hunter' 'Jacques Cousteau' 'Non-words' 'Mecha-Vampires' 'Semi-dead' 'Death, and how it Affects You' 'Werepenguins' 'Pistol' 'Robo-Merfiend' 'Demon-Giant' 'Dragon-Harpy' and 'Necromaster'
ok...O_o
I warned you.
So you did, but that doesn't account for the poor quality of posting here, I can accept this, but you're going to have to post something on the other end of the spectrum to even it out.
This is very...interesting
(>-'o'-)>O___*___l______O<(-'o'-<)
The Ping Pong Kirbies don't have the same effect in this peculiar font.
nvm, their not that bad
quite amusing.
I weep at your cruel words.
The comment was directed at Meta Knight, not you, unless you refer to my earlier comment in which I was merly making a point.
Hey Everyone! I just wanted to tell everyone that Microx is now that user with all the numbbers. I just wanted to tell everyone that I changed my username.
Yggdrasil, spare us.
I Recommend Leaving
You want me to leave?
Good plan!
HEyyyyyyyyyyyy KYLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Caleb? lol, hi
Reogan, just out of curiousity, what on earth do you mean by "learning from cursed tomes"? I'm confused... you & I both know that doesn't take much, but still.
This comment has nothing to do with your story about the "vampiric-demonic-scourge-hunter" story; it's just a comment in general. This is Elphaba/Angela Warren speaking, btw.
Oh, and REPLY TO OUR EMAIL IN LESS THAN FIVE MONTHS THIS TIME, PLEASE!!!!! I will keep bugging you about this for very long periods of time.
I fail to see a single mention of cursed tomes on this post.
I meant in your blogger profile. Sorry, I didn't specify last June.
They teach me the dark secrets of the dead but dreaming elder gods.
*sigh*
Jacques was born this long ago? What a happy day it was.
Obviously not for me.
Whoa! There actually are werepenguins in this! Totally didn't notice that!
What is it about the madcap madness that madden Jacques that keeps you from beginning your love affair with him?
What do you think?
Your inability to love is the only problem.
I love you, just not this story.
It's one of my favorites.
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