Monday, August 30, 2010

A Lapenian Tale

I vas not alvays from Lapenia. I vas born in Czechland. Is good land, but Russia come. Ve need leave. I vas but child; not understand. Ve leave big farm vith peegs and cows and cheekins and come to Lapenia.
At border zey ask "Vhy come to Lapenia? No one come to Lapenia. Everyvun leaf."
Father say "Is Russia. Zey haff come to Czechland."
Border guard nods, "Is happen much. You can stay here."
It cost all monies, but ve get farm. Ve haff two acres, and peeg. Peeg vas good. I call him Ivan. He vas only friend all childhood.
Ve kill him zhat vinter. Ve keep some, but sell much meats to town. Vas good sales, but government take most monies, and ve only get cheekins next year.
Cheekins made eggs, and tveve eggs vere verth crown each. Ve save crowns and use zhem next year.
Ze years after vere hard, but good monies vere saved secretly. Vhen government send father to death in war, he show me monies. Say "Ve keep these from all years. Use to farm."
Vhen he vas killed, I left farm. Vent to south, and started new farm. Try to sell old farm, but government take it. Is not good time.
But I had money, and I bought farm vith two cows, six peegs and four cheekin. Zee rest went to dowry for wife, Ghieri.
Wife is not good. She live for year and give only daughter.
Daughter like wife. Is fat and lazy. She eat but never stop wanting more. I try to marry her avay, but no one wants.
Even Cheski refused. Cheski is like daughter. Is fat and lazy. Sits at bar. All day drinks. Vodka take farm. Vodka take wife. Cheski still drink.
...
I not say zhat if anyone ask. Cheski is fool, but he is big. Is like ox.

Some day I leaf here. Go to America.

Vithout daughter.

4 comments:

Elphaba said...

What a kind father. :)

Reogan said...

Vhat a fat, lazy daughter.

Elphaba said...

Love is blind.

Reogan said...

And daughter is useless.