Thursday, April 01, 2010

Pokémon: The Golden Apocalypse, April Fool's

Red had just begun to stamp out the coals when a spray of frigid water washed over his feet. To his shock, it came from Nyoromo. When the last embers were steaming, the flow stopped, and Nyoromo looked up at Red.
"Wag?"
"You- you did well Nyo. You did very well." Red glanced up. A dark speck had appeared in the sky, and was slowly growing larger. He heard a sound behind him. Turning, he saw the man running.
"Hey! Wait!" Red called. The man glanced back, and in doing so distracted himself and tripped. He hit the ground with a sickening crunch. His arm was twisted at an odd angle, as was a leg, and his staff protruded from his midsection. Red ran to him, and bent down. He heard the man weeping.
"Sir! Is there anything I-"
"Shut up! Shut up you ungrateful whelp! Look what you've done! You've damned us all by what you've done. You've-" Here the man groaned as he raised his head. "You've-" He stopped talking, his eyes looking past Red.
"By Arceus! It's M-" The man's eyes rolled back in his head, and blood poured from the sockets. His mouth opened far too wide, and his cheeks tore. Red watched in horror as his teeth elongated and sharpened, growing into a horrible grin. The staff grew thick, ripping the his torso, and it sprouted branches as it grew tall. The man's shoes tore as his toes and fingers reached into the ground, expanding into pallid, fleshy roots. Through the translucent substance, Red could see filthy blood coursing up into the tree, which stood dead and leafless. Red was horrified. When the man moaned again, he wondered how anyone could survive such a-
He will never die. Red turned and looked at a creature that radiated evil. Only slightly taller than Red, the humanoid had a catlike face. A cord of flesh ran from the back of its head to its back. A long tail swung lazily on the ground. It gestured, and there was a popping noise, and blood spattered upward. Red looked down and saw a scrap of blue flesh. Nyoromo was
Dead. Pokémon may not deserve to live, but they don't deserve the fate humans do. It's your kind that made me what I am. A pokémon in your image. Now I shall remake you. It raised a three fingered hand, and Red buckled. As he fell to the ground, he felt two things burst from his back. As they flapped, he realized they were wings. He turned to look at them, but his eyes had become stone. He tried to scream, but only a terrified whinny came from his mouth. As his mind shattered, all he knew was terror too great to be grasped.
The pokémon surveyed his work, and sensed the pain it had wrought. Still unsatisfied, it rose, and flew south to a small town called Pallet.

57 comments:

Met said...

What sort of conclusion is this!?

Reogan said...

The perfect setup for Yellow.

Qupar said...

what?

Reogan said...

What are you trying to ask?

Elphaba said...

What just happened?

Elphaba said...

Wait a minute, that was the end? I gotta agree with Met, what the heck kind of ending was that? Red turns into a pokemon, the old dude and Nyoromo both die, and THAT'S IT? I'm so confused!

Reogan said...

Red and the old man are doomed to an eternity of torture, Nyoromo dies, and Pallet is threatened. It's a perfect setup to the Yellow arc.

Met said...

You've gotta be kidding me.

Reogan said...

I don't jest with the Apocalypse.

Elphaba said...

Like I said on a different blog, ignore my other comments. If it's a setup, that works.

Reogan said...

I'm glad to see someone trusts my writing.

Met.

Elphaba said...

Not trying to pick a fight here, Met! I can only speak for myself, though...

Reogan said...

I am an instigator, am I not?

Elphaba said...

So, so true.

Met said...

Someone want to explain what's going on with you two? I'm starting to get confused about who believes what and how I'm tied into this.

Reogan said...

Elphaba didn't get the ending until reading BTL. You refuse to accept it.

Elphaba said...

Reogan implied that you didn't trust his writing. I didn't want to seem like a suck-up, so I commented that I wasn't trying to pick a fight, but that Reogan might be. Does that clear it up?

Met said...

I read BTL (for once) and I'm still not going with this. What is the cause for these comments?

Reogan
"I'm glad to see someone trusts my writing.

Met."

Elphaba
"Not trying to pick a fight here, Met! I can only speak for myself, though..."

Am I always going to be your favorite target? Have some respect.

Elphaba said...

Which one of us are you writing to? I'm not trying to "target" you; I wrote that because I wanted it stated that I'm NOT trying to do that.

Reogan said...

Your first two comments contained mistrust enough to validate my selection of you as a target.

Though Qupar's incompetence taunts me...

Met said...

Ah, delayed reaction here. I'm still not sure exactly where Elphaba stands. What's with the exclamation point? You care to explain why you're yelling at me?

Elphaba said...

You care to explain why you're accusing me of yelling at you and the (perceived) snotty tone? I wasn't yelling at you. I was telling you that I didn't want to pick a fight--and I meant it. That's all.

Met said...

Don't type exclamations if you don't mean it.

Reogan said...

See where the misuse of exclamations gets you?

Met said...

Yeah, but we've probably had worse cases. *cough*MetaKnightandGuiness*cough*

Reogan said...

Please don't forget whatever that conglomeration of numbers was. It looked like pi was placed in a blender, ingested, and vomited forth onto the internet.

Elphaba said...

I was worried that you might see it as my trying to pick a fight, and I got upset about it because I didn't want that misunderstanding to happen. Hence, the exclamation point: used while I was emotional.

Met said...

That's quote of the day material right there Reogan.

Reogan said...

Is that colon used properly, Elphaba? I never mastered them.

Met said...

I'm still a little confused, but let it go. I assume you don't mean to antagonize me. However, could you clarify your opinion regarding this chapter?

Elphaba said...

Yeah, that was funny. :P

Reogan said...

This is a messy conversation. Met? You would be much advised to view the header of the blog. Your will is done.

Elphaba said...

I liked the chapter. (The "yeah, that was funny" referred to the pi/blender comment.) Not at first, but when I realized it was a setup for a different part of the Apocalypse, I understood.

Met said...

Thank You ner vod :)

Met said...

Ah, so as usual I am on my own in my position.

Elphaba said...

"You ner vod?"

Elphaba said...

BTW, I don't know if that colon was used properly, although I'm thinking not now that I reread it.

Met said...

*sigh*

Elphaba said...

Sorry. I don't mean to leave you alone, but that's my opinion.

Met said...

I'm perfectly used to it at this point.

Reogan said...

No one really comprehends that punctuation mark. Personally, I hold it in disdain.

Reogan said...

Here, I'll side with you, Met.

Elphaba said...

MET: Again, sorry.

REOGAN: So, so true.

IN GENERAL: I actually am signing off. Night!

Met said...

"You ner vod?"

Topeka it.

Reogan said...

Topeka actually said that it shouldn't be used as a verb. Only as a noun. However, I use Topeka for everything.

Elphaba said...

APRIL FOOLS‽‽‽‽‽ What the crap‽‽‽ You really had me freaked out!

Reogan said...

The interrobang means you needn't use multiple punctuation marks. Don't abuse it.

Elphaba said...

The multiple interrobangs were used to convey my utter shock.

Reogan said...

You made a typo. That sentence should have read "The multiple interrobangs were used to convey my utter incompetence."

Elphaba said...

But they look so cool! I wanted to see what a lot of them would look like!

Reogan said...

That, my dear, is exclamation misuse.

Elphaba said...

I'm not going to do it again. I wanted to see what it would look like, and I did. I also managed to bother you a little bit... Just kidding. :) Mission accomplished.

Reogan said...

You do enjoy forcing ellipses into the ugliest positions possible, don't you?

Elphaba said...

How was that ugly?

Reogan said...

You used it as end punctuation. Where a period would do.

Elphaba said...

Meh, true.

Reogan said...

Thank you.